Whether you’re christening a brand-spanking-new business or rolling-out a minty fresh new product line (or heck, pivoting into an fertile new space?), eventually you’ll face the question of what to name that baby.
And as you may well know, there are no easy answers.
With virtually every decent name already taken, and all the dumb ones spoken for as well (uh, you know who you are), the options are slim to none and dwindling fast. That’s why you have to dig extra deep to find a great name, and most importantly, to avoid making a serious blunder.
By blunder we mean names like Frigidaire (nice for their initial line of freezers and refrigerators, but not so brilliant when rolling out perplexing Frigidaire Ovens and Frigidaire Dishwashers). Or Chevy Nova (which when marketed in Latin America translates to “no va” – or “no go”). Not to mention names like Xerox, which mean absolutely nothing to anyone in this or any other known universe.
But whatever you do, please do not use these names.
1. Nme
Like grunge bands and twerking, the practice of dropping random consonants from names had its 15 minutes of fame. The information super highway will soon be littered with red-faced startups wishing they had listened to their grade school grammar teachers.
2. Name Cloud
The Cloud? It’s here to stay. The name “cloud” itself? Not likely. It’s pretty much a given that your product is internet based, so adding “Cloud” to the name is akin to a winery adding “grape” to its name or a software company adding “soft” to its name (don’t tell Bill Gates we said that).
3. Des Moines Name Works
It’s a global world. While you may think your target market is in your backyard, the fact is to accelerate quickly it’s critical to expand internationally. There’s no reason to pigeonhole yourself into a corner with a name that’s too centric to any given region or local custom.
4. Name (Get it? Name!)
Save bad puns and inside jokes for your holiday party, not for your name. If your potential clients can’t easily connect the dots, chances are you’re only talking to yourself. You’re much better served with a name that resonates with the masses.
5. VirtualNametotious
That’s a mouthful. A virtual tongue twister. Simply put, it’s too complex for anyone’s good. Avoid a name that no one could ever remember or type into a Google search bar. Keep it simple and memorable. Shorter is better.
6. Vanillaname
Last but not least, please don’t create a name that’s blah. You need one that your team (and customers) can get excited about and rally around. Also find a name that allows you to build visual elements around it. If it’s blasé, there’s nowhere to go with it.
The name of the game: Experts
OK, so we’ve touched on what NOT to name your company. That’s the easy part. Now, what should you name your startup? Given the notes above, it may not be enough to roll-up your sleeves and come up with a winner all by yourself.
If you have the bankroll, it will probably pay-off in the long run to bring in a third party who has a more objective perspective. Of course you can hire a naming agency (which probably has a catchy name of its own). Or if you want ideas on a faster timeline and tighter budget, consider freelance branding experts you’ll find in online marketplaces.
Good luck, and if you’re flying solo, don’t forget to dust off that ol’ thesaurus from the bookshelf.